Teachings About Dating
by Ezra Taft Benson
Our Heavenly Father wants you to date young women
who are faithful members of the Church, who encourage you to
serve a full-time mission and to magnify your priesthood.
(CR April 1986, Ensign 16 [May 1986]: 45.)
For many years the Church has counseled parents concerning
their children in early dating and the dangers of "going
steady" prematurely. Here again, you mothers have a
critical role in seeing that this counsel is understood and
accepted by your children. (London England Area Conference, 19-20
June 1976.)
Remember the importance of proper dating. President Spencer W.
Kimball gave some wise counsel: "Clearly, right marriage
begins with right dating. Therefore, this warning comes with
great emphasis. Do not take the chance of dating nonmembers or
members who are untrained and faithless. A girl may say, 'Oh I do
not intend to marry this person. It is just a fun date.' But one
cannot afford to take a chance on falling in love with someone
who may never accept the gospel." (Miracle of Forgiveness,
pp. 241-42.) (See Dating Nonmembers)
Our Heavenly Father wants you to date young men who are
faithful members of the Church, who will be worthy to take you to
the temple and be married the Lord's
way. There will be a new spirit in Zion when the young women
will say to their boyfriends, "If you cannot get a temple
recommend, then I am not about to tie my life to you, even
for mortality!" And the young returned missionary will say
to his girlfriend, "I am sorry, but as much as I love you, I
will not marry out of the holy temple." ("To the Young
Women of the Church," Ensign 16 [November 1986]: 84.)
May I suggest some steps to avoid the pitfalls of immorality:
Avoid late hours and weariness. The Lord
said to retire to your bed early (D&C 88:124), and there
are good reasons for that. Some of the worst sins are
committed after midnight. Officers in the wards and stakes,
branches and missions, should not keep our people, especially
our youth, up late at night even for wholesome recreation.
Keep your dress modest. Short skirts are
not pleasing to the Lord, but modesty is. Girls, do not be an
enticement for your downfall because of your immodest and
tight-fitting clothes. (See Proverbs 1:10; James 1:14-15.)
Have good associates or don't associate at all. Be careful in the selection of your friends. If in the
presence of certain persons you are lifted to nobler heights,
you are in good company. But if your friends or associates
encourage base thoughts, then you had best leave them.
Avoid necking and petting like a plague,
for necking and petting are the concession that precedes the
complete loss of virtue.
Have a good physical outlet of some sport or
exercise. Overcome evil with good. You can overcome
many evil inclinations through good physical exertion and
healthful activities. A healthy soul, free of the body- and
spirit-dulling influences of alcohol and tobacco, is in
better condition to overthrow the devil.
Think clean thoughts. Those who think
clean thoughts do not do dirty deeds. You are responsible
before God not only for your acts but also for controlling
your thoughts. So live that you would not blush with shame if
your thoughts and acts should be flashed on a screen in your
church. The old adage is still true that you sow thoughts and
you reap acts, you sow acts and you reap habits, you sow
habits and you reap a character, and your character
determines your eternal destiny. "As [a man] thinketh in
his heart, so is he" (Proverbs 23:7).
Pray. There is no temptation placed
before you that you cannot shun. Do not allow yourself to get
in positions where it is easy to fall. Listen to the
promptings of the Spirit. If you are engaged in things where
you do not feel you can pray and ask the Lord's blessings on
what you are doing, you are engaged in the wrong kind of
activity. (God, Family, Country, pp. 240-41.)
(See Daily Living home page; Dating and Courtship homepage)
|
